小说园

第7部分（第4页）

he　was　in　this　state。　Then　he　stood　over　against　her；　strong　and

heavy　in　his　revolt；　and　though　he　said　nothing；　still　she　felt

his　anger　and　heavy　impatience　grip　hold　of　her；　she　was　shaken

again　as　out　of　a　torpor。　Again　her　heart　stirred　with　a　quick；

out…running　impulse；　she　looked　at　him；　at　the　stranger　who　was

not　a　gentleman　yet　who　insisted　on　ing　into　her　life；　and

the　pain　of　a　new　birth　in　herself　strung　all　her　veins　to　a　new

form。　She　would　have　to　begin　again；　to　find　a　new　being；　a　new

form；　to　respond　to　that　blind；　insistent　figure　standing　over

against　her。

A　shiver；　a　sickness　of　new　birth　passed　over　her；　the　flame

leaped　up　him；　under　his　skin。　She　wanted　it；　this　new　life　from

him；　with　him；　yet　she　must　defend　herself　against　it；　for　it

was　a　destruction。

As　he　worked　alone　on　the　land；　or　sat　up　with　his　ewes　at

lambing　time；　the　facts　and　material　of　his　daily　life　fell

away；　leaving　the　kernel　of　his　purpose　clean。　And　then　it　came

upon　him　that　he　would　marry　her　and　she　would　be　his　life。

Gradually；　even　without　seeing　her；　he　came　to　know　her。　He

would　have　liked　to　think　of　her　as　of　something　given　into　his

protection；　like　a　child　without　parents。　But　it　was　forbidden

him。　He　had　to　e　down　from　this　pleasant　view　of　the　case。

She　might　refuse　him。　And　besides；　he　was　afraid　of　her。

But　during　the　long　February　nights　with　the　ewes　in　labour；

looking　out　from　the　shelter　into　the　flashing　stars；　he　knew　he

did　not　belong　to　himself。　He　must　admit　that　he　was　only

fragmentary；　something　inplete　and　subject。　There　were　the

stars　in　the　dark　heaven　travelling；　the　whole　host　passing　by

on　some　eternal　voyage。　So　he　sat　small　and　submissive　to　the

greater　ordering。

Unless　she　would　e　to　him；　he　must　remain　as　a

nothingness。　It　was　a　hard　experience。　But；　after　her　repeated

obliviousness　to　him；　after　he　had　seen　so　often　that　he　did　not

exist　for　her；　after　he　had　raged　and　tried　to　escape；　and　said

he　was　good　enough　by　himself；　he　was　a　man；　and　could　stand