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第28部分(第3页)

on the outside once more。 She was going to give a tea…party。 It

made him frightened and furious and miserable。 He was afraid all

would be lost that he had so newly e into: like the youth in

the fairy tale; who was king for one day in the year; and for

the rest a beaten herd: like Cinderella also; at the feast。 He

was sullen。 But she blithely began to make preparations for her

tea…party。 His fear was too strong; he was troubled; he hated

her shallow anticipation and joy。 Was she not forfeiting the

reality; the one reality; for all that was shallow and

worthless? Wasnt she carelessly taking off her crown to be an

artificial figure having other artificial women to tea: when she

might have been perfect with him; and kept him perfect; in the

land of intimate connection? Now he must be deposed; his joy

must be destroyed; he must put on the vulgar; shallow death of

an outward existence。

He ground his soul in uneasiness and fear。 But she rose to a

real outburst of house…work; turning him away as she shoved the

furniture aside to her broom。 He stood hanging miserable near。

He wanted her back。 Dread; and desire for her to stay with him;

and shame at his own dependence on her drove him to anger。 He

began to lose his head。 The wonder was going to pass away again。

All the love; the magnificent new order was going to be lost;

she would forfeit it all for the outside things。 She would admit

the outside world again; she would throw away the living fruit

for the ostensible rind。 He began to hate this in her。 Driven by

fear of her departure into a state of helplessness; almost of

imbecility; he wandered about the house。

And she; with her skirts kilted up; flew round at her work;

absorbed。

〃Shake the rug then; if you must hang round;〃 she said。

And fretting with resentment; he went to shake the rug。 She

was blithely unconscious of him。 He came back; hanging near to

her。

〃Cant you do anything?〃 she said; as if to a child;

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