小说园

第64部分（第4页）

to　get　away。　She　wanted　the　light；　the　presence　of　other　people；

the　external　connection　with　the　many。　Above　all　she　wanted　to

lose　herself　among　natural　surroundings。

She　took　her　leave　of　her　mistress　and　returned　home。　She　was

glad　to　be　on　the　station　with　a　crowd　of　Saturday…night　people；

glad　to　sit　in　the　lighted；　crowded　railway　carriage。　Only　she

did　not　want　to　meet　anybody　she　knew。　She　did　not　want　to　talk。

She　was　alone；　immune。

All　this　stir　and　seethe　of　lights　and　people　was　but　the

rim；　the　shores　of　a　great　inner　darkness　and　void。　She　wanted

very　much　to　be　on　the　seething；　partially　illuminated　shore；

for　within　her　was　the　void　reality　of　dark　space。

For　a　time　Miss　Inger；　her　mistress；　was　gone；　she　was　only　a

dark　void；　and　Ursula　was　free　as　a　shade　walking　in　an

underworld　of　extinction；　of　oblivion。　Ursula　was　glad；　with　a

kind　of　motionless；　lifeless　gladness；　that　her　mistress　was

extinct；　gone　out　of　her。

In　the　morning；　however；　the　love　was　there　again；　burning；

burning。　She　remembered　yesterday；　and　she　wanted　more；　always

more。　She　wanted　to　be　with　her　mistress。　All　separation　from

her　mistress　was　a　restriction　from　living。　Why　could　she　not　go

to　her　to…day；　to…day？　Why　must　she　pace　about　revoked　at

Cossethay　whilst　her　mistress　was　elsewhere？　She　sat　down　and

wrote　a　burning；　passionate　love…letter：　she　could　not　help

it。

The　two　women　became　intimate。　Their　lives　seemed　suddenly　to

fuse　into　one；　inseparable。　Ursula　went　to　Winifreds　lodging；

she　spent　there　her　only　living　hours。　Winifred　was　very　fond　of

water；……of　swimming；　of　rowing。　She　belonged　to　various

athletic　clubs。　Many　delicious　afternoons　the　two　girls　spent　in

a　light　boat　on　the　river；　Winifred　always　rowing。　Indeed；

Winifred　seemed　to　delight　in　having　Ursula　in　her　charge；　in

giving　things　to　the　girl；　in　filling　and　enrichening　her

life。

So　that　Ursula　developed　rapidly　during　the　few　months　of　her