小说园

第23部分（第1页）

all　her　perfumed；　turquoise　jewelry…wearing　glory；　acting　like　her　presence　was　really　no　big　deal。

Jesus。　Jenny　had　seen　their　mom　in　Prague。Why　hadn？t　shewarned　him？

Dan　brought　in　his　mother？s　packages　and　placed　them　gently　on　the　kitchen　floor。　Vanessa　tried

to　make　eye　contact　with　him　but　his　eyes　were　glued　downward；　and　he　was　seemingly　deep　in

thought。　Or　in　a　trance。　Maybe　his　mother　had　hypnotized　him？　Maybe　she　was　a　New　Age

gypsy？

？Now；　Dan；？　Jeanette　began；　as　she　rooted　through　the　cavernous　bags；　pulling　out　assorted

packages　and　placing　them　on　top　of　the　piles　of　newspapers　covering　the　kitchen　table；　？Jenny

told　me　all　about　your　special　announcement；　and　I？m　here　to　help　you　celebrate！？　Vanessa　stifled

a　nervous　laugh　as　Dan？s　face　turned　sheet　white。

Rufus　held　the　spatula；　piled　with　what　Vanessa　was　now　convinced　was　dog　food；　even　though

they　didn？t　have　a　dog。　？What　announcement？？　？Coffee！？　Jeanette　chirped　excitedly　opening　a

large　pink　box　and　shoving　the　contents　under　Dan？s　nose。　？Will　go　perfectly　withthese　。？　Dan

craned　his　neck　and　peered　inside。　Cradled　in　white　wax　paper　was　a　chocolate　？clair。　Two　plump

cream　puffs　nestled　on　either　side　of　the　long；　frosted　pastry。　His　face　flushed　red　with

embarrassment。　Maybe　he　was　just　being　paranoid　or　perverted；　but　that　looked　a　whole　lot　like

a？？It？s　a　penis！？　his　mother　trilled；　as　if　reading　her　son？s　thoughts。　？It？s　to　celebrate　Dan　being

gay！？　Jeanette　practically　screamed。　？The　cream　in　the　center　is　the　sweetest　part。？　She　winked。

Um；　ew？

？Gay？？Rufus　brought　the　spatula　to　his　lips　and　chewed　thoughtfully。　？When　did　this　happen？？

All　eyes　turned　to　Dan。　？Like　。　。　。　I　don？t　know　exactly；？　he　stammered；　wishing　the　parquet　floor

would　just　open　up　and　swallow　him　whole。　His　mother　had　traveled　three　thousand　miles　just　to

give　him　a　penis　pastry？　She　was　back　because　he？d　e　out　of　the　closet？　He　was　going　tokill

Jenny　for　opening　her　little　mouth。　Besides；　what　did　penises　have　to　do　with　anything？　There　was

nothing　sexual　about　his　conundrum。

Wasn？t　there？

Rufus　shrugged　and　took　another　bite　of　mustard…brown　slop。　？And　here　I　thought　Jeanie　just

missed　me？ha！？　Dan？s　hand　flew　to　his　chest　in　an　unconscious　and　totally　effeminate　gesture。

Rufus　continued；　an　insane…looking　grin　now　plastered　to　his　bearded　face。　？Well；　you？ll

remember　what　you？re　missing　now；　won？t　you　Jean…Jean？　Andthen　you？ll　be　sick　of　living　like

royalty　in　Europe。？　He　shook　the　lime　green　apparatus　at　her　and　turned　back　to　Dan。　？Does　this

mean　I　need　to　learn　to　cook　quiche？？　he　asked。

？Anyway；？　Jeanette　sang　out；　ignoring　her　estranged　husband　as　she　began　pulling　what　looked

like　yards　of　magenta　silk　out　of　a　large　white　box。　？I　brought　you　some　gifts　to　mark　this　very