小说园

第39部分（第2页）

whitewashed　church。　In　its　shadowy　atmosphere　he　sank　back　into

being。　He　liked　to　sink　himself　in　its　hush　as　a　stone　sinks

into　water。

He　went　across　his　garden；　mounted　the　wall　by　the　little

steps；　and　entered　the　hush　and　peace　of　the　church。　As　the

heavy　door　clanged　to　behind　him；　his　feet　re…echoed　in　the

aisle；　his　heart　re…echoed　with　a　little　passion　of　tenderness

and　mystic　peace。　He　was　also　slightly　ashamed；　like　a　man　who

has　failed；　who　lapses　back　for　his　fulfilment。

He　loved　to　light　the　candles　at　the　organ；　and　sitting　there

alone　in　the　little　glow；　practice　the　hymns　and　chants　for　the

service。　The　whitewashed　arches　retreated　into　darkness；　the

sound　of　the　organ　and　the　organ…pedals　died　away　upon　the

unalterable　stillness　of　the　church；　there　were　faint；　ghostly

noises　in　the　tower；　and　then　the　music　swelled　out　again；

loudly；　triumphantly。

He　ceased　to　fret　about　his　life。　He　relaxed　his　will；　and

let　everything　go。　What　was　between　him　and　his　wife　was　a　great

thing；　if　it　was　not　everything。　She　had　conquered；　really。　Let

him　wait；　and　abide；　wait　and　abide。　She　and　the　baby　and

himself；　they　were　one。　The　organ　rang　out　his　protestation。　His

soul　lay　in　the　darkness　as　he　pressed　the　keys　of　the

organ。

To　Anna；　the　baby　was　a　plete　bliss　and　fulfilment。　Her

desires　sank　into　abeyance；　her　soul　was　in　bliss　over　the　baby。

It　was　rather　a　delicate　child；　she　had　trouble　to　rear　it。　She

never　for　a　moment　thought　it　would　die。　It　was　a　delicate

infant；　therefore　it　behoved　her　to　make　it　strong。　She　threw

herself　into　the　labour；　the　child　was　everything。　Her

imagination　was　all　occupied　here。　She　was　a　mother。　It　was

enough　to　handle　the　new　little　limbs；　the　new　little　body；　hear

the　new　little　voice　crying　in　the　stillness。　All　the　future

rang　to　her　out　of　the　sound　of　the　babys　crying　and　cooing；

she　balanced　the　ing　years　of　life　in　her　hands；　as　she

nursed　the　child。　The　passionate　sense　of　fulfilment；　of　the

future　germinated　in　her；　made　her　vivid　and　powerful。　All　the

future　was　in　her　hands；　in　the　hands　of　the　woman。　And　before

this　baby　was　ten　months　old；　she　was　again　with　child。　She

seemed　to　be　in　the　fecund　of　storm　life；　every　moment　was　full

and　busy　with　productiveness　to　her。　She　felt　like　the　earth；