小说园

第62部分（第3页）

how　could　he　find　his　highest　good　in　giving　up　his　life　for　the

material　prosperity　of　everybody　else！　What　he　considered　an

unimportant　thing　for　himself　he　could　not　think　worthy　of　every

sacrifice　on　behalf　of　other　people。　And　that　which　he　would

consider　of　the　deepest　importance　to　himself　as　an

individual……oh；　he　said；　you　mustnt　consider　the　munity

from　that　standpoint。　No……no……we　know　what　the

munity　wants；　it　wants　something　solid；　it　wants　good　wages；

equal　opportunities；　good　conditions　of　living；　thats　what　the

munity　wants。　It　doesnt　want　anything　subtle　or　difficult。

Duty　is　very　plain…keep　in　mind　the　material；　the　immediate

welfare　of　every　man；　thats　all。

So　there　came　over　Skrebensky　a　sort　of　nullity；　which　more

and　more　terrified　Ursula。　She　felt　there　was　something　hopeless

which　she　had　to　submit　to。　She　felt　a　great　sense　of　disaster

impending。　Day　after　day　was　made　inert　with　a　sense　of

disaster。　She　became　morbidly　sensitive；　depressed；

apprehensive。　It　was　anguish　to　her　when　she　saw　one　rook　slowly

flapping　in　the　sky。　That　was　a　sign　of　ill…omen。　And　the

foreboding　became　so　black　and　so　powerful　in　her；　that　she　was

almost　extinguished。

Yet　what　was　the　matter？　At　the　worst　he　was　only　going　away。

Why　did　she　mind；　what　was　it　she　feared？　She　did　not　know。　Only

she　had　a　black　dread　possessing　her。　When　she　went　at　night　and

saw　the　big；　flashing　stars　they　seemed　terrible；　by　day　she　was

always　expecting　some　charge　to　be　made　against　her。

He　wrote　in　March　to　say　that　he　was　going　to　South　Africa　in

a　short　time；　but　before　he　went；　he　would　snatch　a　day　at　the

Marsh。

As　if　in　a　painful　dream；　she　waited　suspended；　unresolved。

She　did　not　know；　she　could　not　understand。　Only　she　felt　that

all　the　threads　of　her　fate　were　being　held　taut；　in　suspense。

She　only　wept　sometimes　as　she　went　about；　saying　blindly：

〃I　am　so　fond　of　him；　I　am　so　fond　of　him。〃

He　came。　But　why　did　he　e？　She　looked　at　him　for　a　sign。